Of many flavors of letting go, the joy of work, and the achiness of a stiff body.

  1. She wakes up way too early crying but doesn’t soothe herself back to sleep as usual. I try to find out why. She says yes to everything I suggest. I hate not knowing.
  2. Sweater weather.
  3. He is his own kind of parent. And that’s okay.
  4. I send her two messages, then a third. I didn’t want to do the last one, but I had to–for both of us.
  5. Today’s workday is all work for once. Writing, setting up, connecting, asking, growing.
  6. I choose to look at it as intermittent fasting, knowing the gnawing sensation will stop in a few days, leaving me with clearer head and lighter conscience. But damn, I’m hungry.
  7. The doctor rolls her feet, her hips, her back, talks about tightness and stretching. All I can focus on is those same pains in my own body. How much I don’t want her to have them.
  8. Cancelled plans all over the calendar. I gently set aside my disappointment to instead embrace the space.
  9. I hate the link-killing algorithm.
  10. Three open tabs, each one a purported wellspring of clients, projects, and money. I do my best to showcase what I have, fitting square pegs into round holes, and putting as much warmth into these cold contacts as I can muster.

Author: Ellie

Uppity stardust. Will eat (almost) anything.

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