Noticing.FortyTwo

Of so much crying, fighting the female voice, and not being able to eat like I did when I was 20.

  1. I don’t know if I’m fighting a cold, the chilly weather, or a sense of ennui, but the alarm goes off and I don’t get up for another forty-five minutes. Maybe all three
  2. I cry into the pages. I cry on his chest. I cry in the public bathroom. All from different triggers that are actually all the same.
  3. It’s a great sweater.
  4. More water.
  5. I ruthlessly self-edit, cutting “weak” language to emphasize my professionalism while simultaneously worrying about being read as bitchy. The real female trouble.
  6. Learning to trust means sometimes you have to clean up pee twice in one day.
  7. Body, soul, and spirit are meant to be connected.
  8. You can’t lose it. You have to give it away.
  9. It’s the chips that did it; I could’ve gotten away with the pizza. Every joint in my hands aches, and I’ll wake up with a bread-and-salt hangover.
  10. Dear Lord, let me make that 5am club meeting.

Author: Ellie

Uppity stardust. Will eat (almost) anything.

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